Bonsai pen camping

They told me that I should change this paragraph.I edited it and checked grammar.Is it good? - index of / angela / .jpg /

Something should change it? I could not write the 2 points in comparison. I urge you to go to the link. I must really know how good it is.

In this section:
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index? ...

To do this: The next morning, everyone speechless with breakfast at the Jade, a charming garden in front of the house, except David, who slept in the couch in the living room. He spent a long night in front of the television, the news in the morning until two clock. A triple stone fountain was in the middle of the sunny garden, the daylilies. She was surrounded by many colors, ornamental shade leaned slightly on the single table, breakfast beige below. Angela saw the pancakes with honey, which he charmingly to his mother, Angela, when she was young, often recalled praying.

SO?